Get on the merry-go-round of life!

You are frozen between action and worry. You think, if I jump on there I will look silly, childish, or maybe even get hurt. You wonder what others will think if you make a fool of yourself. You fidget, put your hands in your pockets, and watch it go around again, and again…and again. You look forlornly at those on the carousel, and say to yourself, “Why can’t I be like that?”

You come back every day to watch, you are drawn to the carousel by a mysterious force. One day, something inside you snaps. You suddenly leap onto the merry-go round! You are beside yourself with joy. You cannot believe how much fun this is. You ask yourself, “Why did I wait this long?”

As you look around, you notice all the others who were on the carousel before you are gone. You find out they have all moved on to create new merry-go rounds, spreading the word. As you ride the carousel you see many forlorn faces in the crowd, and you wave them on with all your might. Get on the ride!

Sometimes it is best just to smile.

They say you should treat rudeness with kindness or some such notion. I believe more in instant karma. I also believe in standing up to bullies.

The guy in the suit babbled away on his mobile about “securities plays” in a loud voice hoping to impress everyone around him, rushing ahead of me to get in the checkout queue. As the checkout lady started bagging his items, she put the “next order” divider after his groceries and that was my signal to put things on the conveyor. One problem, he was so engrossed in his inane conversation he would not move down towards the bag area and kept his hand on my side of the divider as if to say “I am not ready to give up this space yet”. As I said above, I am not good at suffering fools, so I started emptying my cart over, around, and ON TOP OF HIS HAND, while he stood there with an angry look on his face. I just smiled and unloaded all my items on the conveyor, mostly ignoring him.

He finally got off the phone, looked at me and said loudly, “what’s YOU’RE problem?” I calmly looked him in the eye and said “I have none except people around me that are so caught up in their inane phone conversations, they have no clue what’s going on around them. And this store is not YOUR ‘territory’, it is meant to be shared by everyone”. He had nothing to say except a few profanities, and as he walked out the door he gave me the one-fingered salute. I smiled and waved. As a martial artist, I am aware of what can happen in fights so very rarely go down that path.

I thought everything was okay until minutes later I got on my exercise bike for my daily afternoon ride. I usually start slow at about 100 heartbeats per minute and work my way up through interval training to about 140 beats. Imagine my surprise when I got on the bike and my monitor showed 135 beats per minute! Could that incident in the store have done that to me? I knew it did.

My training in yoga and Brazilian Jiu Jitsu has given me some insights on breathing. Immediately I concentrated on taking deep breaths from the abdomen, filling it up, then breathing out very slowly. I also focused on turning my thoughts on what I was having for dinner. I did this for about a couple of minutes and was glad to see the monitor register 110 beats even as I increased the pace on the bike.

The moral: control your temper, breathe, breathe, and breathe…..Also, don’t give in to rude people or bullies. They must learn that what comes around goes around, sometimes immediately.

“The most important thing is not victory, the most important thing is not getting defeated”. Rickson Gracie

Bodium Castle, England, in the background, with the more modern gun emplacement used in WWII in the foreground. Defences in martial arts have likewise evolved.

Unfortunately for the defenders, Medieval attackers were soon able to penetrate their defences. Common techniques included burrowing beneath the corners of towers–undermining their foundations, thus causing the castle to collapse.

To counter this, castle designers added thicker outer walls–and then rings of extra outer walls. The idea of the concentric castle was then born about 1270.

From about the 1500, castles began to fade from fashion, and wealthy countries were choosing to build palaces rather than fortifications.

The reason for this was the advent of gunpowder. Stone castles, which were so impenetrable just a couple of hundred years before, were no match for mighty cannons.

Martial arts defences.

A good defence in martial arts will also evolve and stand the test of time. It will be easily adaptable to the circumstances. The three forms of defence are Stand-Up, Takedown, and Ground. Mastering all three will ensure your development as a well-rounded martial artist.

Stand-Up Defence

A good stand-up defence requires three elements; hand positioning, evasive head movement, and footwork. The best martial artists master all three.

Hand positioning. The hands should be held high, creating a barrier to head attacks. Elbows should be tucked in, protecting the midsection, and discouraging kicks by providing a bony target. Attacks should be launched only with the non-attacking hand in a protective position. Blocking and parrying with the hands, elbows, and forearms is used. As the Muay Thai fighters have proven with their effectiveness at blocking leg kicks with checks, the legs are also used.

Evasive head movement. Muhammad Ali was a master at moving his head out of the way of incoming punches. His slipping, bobbing, and weaving have been copied by boxers for decades since. Mike Tyson’s style of peek-a-boo defence was also considered impenetrable. All of the great fighters, including martial artists, possess this head movement, and Bruce Lee was one of the first to demonstrate its effectiveness.

Footwork. Traditional martial artists and also boxers have demonstrated the importance of footwork to avoid getting hit. By being light on your feet and mobile, you are a hard target. Footwork should be mastered as a means of defence and also attack. Lyoto Machida and Georges St. Pierre are examples of great footwork in the UFC.

Takedown Defence

Wrestlers have mastered this as it is an essential part of their training. Simple movements such as sprawling and whizzers make it very difficult to take a wrestler down. Wrestlers have dominated many mixed martial arts events because of their ability to not only take down their opponents, but also avoid takedowns. Fighters specialising in stand-up fighting are now experts at keeping fights standing using these moves. The great ex-UFC fighter, Chuck Liddell, was a prime example. He was a collegiate wrestler, but chose to keep the fight standing up due to his knockout power. He was able to dictate where the fight would take place.

Ground Defence

According to most experts in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, the primary goal for beginner students is to develop a good defence. This defence should include escapes from not only the worst positions, but also the most common attacks. By mastering defence, a the BJJ student can then learn to attack with confidence, without feeling vulnerable to their opponent’s attacks. As the variety of attacks have increased in BJJ, the defences have evolved to counter this.

Drill, drill, drill

Luckily for the martial artist, you can drill all aspects of your defence. By using a resisting opponent, BJJ fighters and wrestlers are uniquely preparing themselves for the realities of combat. Stand-up fighters can sharpen their defence using footwork drills, evasive head movement against an attacking partner with full head and glove protection, and most importantly, sparring against a live opponent. How good is your defence, and what are you doing to improve it?

The black belt is an exclusive club for a reason.

A little brother of one of our brown belts came in to his brother’s grading. I asked the child why he quit training and he said “I was bored”. Fair enough. But I added, “Not everyone is cut out to be a black belt”. He looked up at me with a bit of irritation on his face and stated, “If I wanted to be a black belt I could, I just don’t want to”. I left it at that, because I did not want to insult him or crush his self-esteem.

Lacking Passion

But I thought to myself, if someone is bored by the journey, the process, and the day-to-day work that it takes to get to the top in the martial arts, they are not cut out to be a black belt. It is not any reflection on them, but a person has to be passionate about it. Nothing less will sustain them over the long journey to black belt.

Lacking Determination and Persistence

In our system brown belt is the first real challenging belt. A good many of the candidates don’t pass it the first time around. But more importantly, this is the first test of determination and persistence. Many give up after not obtaining it, thinking it is too hard, or maybe they thought they should have passed. Some quit because their friends passed and they did not. But the ones who eventually make it to black belt get more determined and sometimes put forth the most impressive efforts of their classes the next grading. It is an inspiration to see. They have passed the most important test on the way to black belt.

Lacking Desire

Only five percent of the people who walk through the door will ever make it to black belt. Many of the ones who quit have exceptional talent. In fact, some are so good they look like a black belt at purple belt. But they lack one important quality—desire to be a black belt. My football coach used to tell us “You have to want it”, and it is the most truthful statement I have ever heard about desire.

Not everyone is cut out to be a black belt. That little boy truly did not want to be a black belt. Hopefully those that quit are able to find other sports or activities where they can excel and where they have enough passion, determination, and desire to get to the top. The black belt is, and should be an exclusive club.

Jimi Hendrix was the ultimate shredder on the guitar

Urban Dictionary

shred

surfing: performing a series of cutbacks requiring seemingly impossible adeptness.

To play so amazingly fast on guitar you almost destroy it’s strings.

Sometimes you learn lessons in the strangest places. I learned a few behind the bar. Fresh out of bar tending school in San Diego, I had a big break. The school, impressed with my scores on the exams, and especially my pestering them every day for a job, hooked me up with one of the busiest and best bars in San Diego.

I was impressed by Steve, the manager. He was fast, personable, and funny. But the next day, a blonde surfer dude with a bit of a swagger walked into the bar. Steve said to me, “Dave is a shredder”. I asked him what that meant, and he said, “Watch him work. He gets it done. He is in a league of his own”.

That night, I trained with Dave, and I soon knew what Steve was talking about. Dave was in well #4. He was handling the orders of three cocktail waitresses, plus the busiest section of the bar, all by himself. I was his bar back, which meant gofer, running to and from the back with the supplies he needed. He was getting orders by the dozens from the waitresses, memorizing them (no writing or anything allowed, it was too slow) and cranking them out within seconds, meanwhile cracking jokes to the people at the bar, spinning and tossing the the bottles behind his back, and collecting one heck of a lot of money for the establishment. We were truly “in the weeds”, which meant snowed under with people five deep at the bar waving $20 notes, before long. While other guys in the bar, including myself, were getting stressed out, Dave kept his cool, and just switched gears. He was in the zone, and within minutes, we were caught up. The rush was over. I was exhausted.

That night, I knew one thing. I wanted to be a “shredder”. I later asked Dave for his secrets to success. To this day I have applied many of his secrets, as they work in any field, especially martial arts. Here are his secrets.

Enjoy the Present

Dave lived in the present. While most bartenders were university students or in between careers, Dave was a pro. He always wanted to be a bartender, and he wanted to be the best. He had a great sense of humour, and every night he had at least ten or twelve people at the bar, where he held court. His stories, jokes, and personality had that bar full every night. He rarely drank. Sometimes he had more than one attractive woman at the bar competing for his attention. He introduced people, creating many friendships. His customers loved him. Dave loved bartending.

Drill like a Demon

They had us do drills in bartending school with water and food colouring in bottles and plastic spouts on the end. I threw mine away after graduating. Dave still had his. He had a game, timing himself to see how fast he could pour different combinations, and of course, tossing the bottles up in the air, catching it behind his back, and other tricks. He showed me how to do many of them. He knew how to breathe fire, his most popular trick.

Know Your Stuff

Dave had over two thousand drinks memorised and he was always looking at recipe cards and trying to create his own mixes. He explained to me that the better you knew them, the faster you could work as you did not have to recall how to make them, especially under pressure.

Get in your Discomfort Zone

Dave always asked to be in well #4. He and Steve were the only ones fast enough to handle the demands of that well. This kept him in constant practice under pressure. He loved the challenge.

Work Without Fear

I asked Dave how he kept so cool under pressure, and his answer surprised me. He said, “I don’t really care what people, including the boss, think about my performance. I am doing my best, and if they don’t like it, I will go down the street and get a better job, because I have faith in my abilities. So what is the worst that can happen?” He was not worried about making mistakes, spilling drinks, or offending customers. He was super relaxed and this is what gave him the ability to work with reckless abandon.

Have a Bit of Balance in Your Life

On his days off, Dave was learning how to fly small planes. It was his way to chill out after busy nights behind the bar. It was his other passion, and he jumped into it with gusto as well.

Dave made a big impact on me during that time in my life. I never approached his skill and speed as a bartender, but before long, I was working well #4. Once or twice I thought I heard Steve say to the new bartenders something about “shredder” as he pointed my way.

Dave, last I heard, was flying 747’s for Delta Airlines. If there is an emergency up in the air, you hope you have someone like Dave flying your airplane. This wizard behind the bar taught me much about life and success.

Are you a shredder?